


Melt my heart

by devinemoon



Category: NCT (Band), WAYV
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Christmas Fluff, Falling In Love, Fluff, Light Angst, M/M, Underage Drinking
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-24
Updated: 2020-12-24
Packaged: 2021-03-10 23:14:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,605
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28275150
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/devinemoon/pseuds/devinemoon
Summary: In which Kun falls in love softly, like the first snow kissing the city.
Relationships: Chittaphon Leechaiyapornkul | Ten/Qian Kun
Comments: 4
Kudos: 69





	Melt my heart

**Author's Note:**

> hiiiii this is a small (small?) christmas special i wrote for my ongoing kunten au on twitter, but can be read just as another christmas fic. i've been working on it for a few weeks now and i really really hope everyone enjoys it! -moon <3

_**"I need someone  
Slowly, very slowly  
My heart is melting  
I want to escape this bird-cage  
And go to a place of rest so I can breathe  
A person who I can truly love." ** _

_**The little match girl, Bael A Yeon x Wendy.** _

—December 

The cold air kisses Kun’s red cheeks constantly, enough to make his teeth chatter but not to get him out of his own head. His head has been full of thoughts ever since the University’s film festival announcement was made, giving him a little over six months to work on a short film and lots of headaches from staying up until 4 a.m. just to organize his thoughts.

He enters the office just then, the warmth hugs him as soon as he comes through the doors, a few teachers turn their heads to look at the man who just entered but quickly go back to keep working or having coffee. He walks quickly to Mr. Lee 's desk, handing him a folder full of references and a small summary of his project. 

Mr. Lee takes his time, going through each page carefully and making sure to ask Kun a few questions in between pages. 

“I really like it, you know? Your project seems really neat, organized…” Kun nods his head. “Almost too organized.”

Huh? Too organized?

He hears Mr. Lee sighs before handing him back his folder. 

“Kun, your one of my best students. You know what works for your style, what you like and how you like your projects to go. But I feel like you’re missing something more wild and messy.”

Kun shivers at the thought of changing his style. No one has ever successfully made him change his style, if there’s something he was not ready to give up on is his minimal and nest style. 

“You might want to look for someone to help you.” Mr. Lee tells him. “Lately the office’s main topic has been a really amazing art student who just started his first semester here. Seems like all his teachers are in love with his work.”

“A freshman? Wouldn't it be too much for him? You know since we’re ahead of them and--” 

“Only a semester apart. And who knows? He really seems smart and talented, maybe  _ you  _ will learn something from  _ him _ .” 

There’s an unsettling feeling at the pit of Kun’s stomach as he makes his way back to his dorm. A freshman helping him with what’s probably the most important project of his student life? It seems almost ridiculous… He’s been working by himself for years and no one has ever asked him to change something or collaborate with someone.

But Mr. Lee wouldn’t suggest him to get some help just because, right? 

He sighs, opening his book and organizing everything to have a small studying season. 

  
  


— January 

Turns out the prodigy student every teacher talks about is the same Kun saw rush into his classroom at the beginning of the semester some weeks ago.

Ten comes when the winter wind is so cold it makes your fingers numb and your hot chocolate feel like it’s not hot enough to fight January's weather. First thing Kun notices is the fact that the younger doesn’t seem to be affected by the cold like other students do. While others seem to walk a little slower, lazier and overall tired, Ten’s energy makes his surroundings look like it’s the start of the summer, even when he's wrapped in a big coat and a thick scarf. 

He finds lots of things about Ten fairly interesting and equally as weird like the fact that he’s always late because he convinces himself he can sleep for five more minutes every morning, or that he doesn’t eat fruits but somehow loves doodling them on his notes. If he really thinks about it it’s like they’re totally opposites one to the other and he can see exactly why Mr. Lee suggested having Ten help him with his film project. 

It doesn’t take him long to ask him for help with his project and Ten seems extremely excited to be working with his senior. It takes Kun less than a week to explain the project, what he has in mind and the type of work he expects for the other to deliver. When everything is fully explained and both ends have agreed on a schedule, they start working. 

The schedule is simple, throughout the week Ten updates him on different art pieces he works on and when Friday comes, they meet in one of the art rooms to discuss the next pieces and when exactly they have to be done. Some days it’s just the two of them, but other days they’re joined by Ten's best friend Doyoung, who is nice and always makes sure to buy something for them to have a small snack, and on more unlucky nights, they’re joined by Ten’s boyfriend, Mike.

Ten’s boyfriend who smells like weed and mold and whose hair looks messy and burned. Who brags about knowing those “not so famous artists” Kun hears everyone talk about around campus and who is extremely loud when he wants Ten to finish his projects quickly.

Mike, who Kun hates, and who’s acting insufferable tonight, rushing Ten to finish his part of the project. Ten does a half assed job, convincing Kun into finishing the meeting earlier per his boyfriend’s request. 

As soon as Kun agrees, Ten’s boyfriend tells him he’ll wait for him outside, giving Kun a pat on the shoulder before making his way out. 

“What’s the rush to finish early? If you don’t mind me asking.” Kun asks as he gathers his things to go back to his dorm, there’s no use for him to stay there anyway. Maybe he’ll work a little bit more on his other assignments, maybe he’ll go to sleep early for the first time in months. 

“Today’s open mic night in Poe’s café, Mike has a new poem he wants to share with everyone else so he’s excited to go.” 

Kun knows about Poe’s café and the really talented artists who like to share their works with others, but he also knows about Mike’s plagiarized-but-not-really poetry. He’s not sure Mike will make it out of there without someone exposing him for using other poet’s verses. 

Ten rushes to get everything inside his bag as soon as he hears Mike calling his name once again.

“Goodbye! Text me if you need anything.” 

Ten leaves the room quickly, door slamming on his way out and leaving Kun with only one question on his mind.  _ What does he even see in Mike? _

  
  


—Second week of January

  
  


Ten’s friends are planning on throwing him a party. They are trying to keep it as a secret and just as small as they possibly can, only letting Ten’s closest friends know about it and so they decide to tell Kun about it. Until that moment, Kun has never stopped to think if whatever he has with Ten is anything close to a friendship but now that Doyoung has added him to a group chat called “Ten’s birthday bash.” he finds himself thinking about it during lunch, in the library while studying and even while taking a shower. 

Seems like being considered part of Ten’s friendship group is not as bad as he thought, Ten is a very thoughtful and loving friend, always keeping an eye on them and making sure to have time for them between his somewhat busy schedule. 

(He won’t say it but he admires Ten’s will to make his friends feel loved and cheer them up even when he himself feels down. He also worries about him, but instead of voicing it he finds small ways to make his day a bit easier.)

So he talks to his own friend group about it, asks them whether he should go or not, when they say yes he talks to his roommate, Taeil about and when he says it sounds like a good idea, he asks himself about it. 

Two days later, he texts Doyoung right before entering his last lecture of the day. 

  
  


_ “Ok. Do you want me to help you with something? _

_ Read 04:20” _

  
  


—Last week of January

“I can’t believe you never told me about your birthday!” Ten nags at Kun, voice way too loud for the common art room. Some students turn their head to look at their table and some others gather their things, probably tired of hearing Ten nag to Kun about his birthday for the nth time. 

“I barely  _ knew you _ .” Kun whispers, keeping his head low not exactly sure if for the embarrassment or for the discomfort of having all eyes on him. “Besides it’s not even that important.” 

“How is that not important?! It’s the day you were born!” Ten’s loud voices rise from among the silence once again. Kun can hear someone from the back of the room screaming. “ **_Hey freshman, keep your voice down or get out_ ** .” 

Ten is about to fight whoever decided to interrupt him and Kun takes the decision to take his wrist and drag him out of the room, leaving almost all their belongings. Ten keeps whining and nagging at him all the way outside. Kun silently prays their belongings will still be there for when they decide to come back. 

They get to a small area, it’s already late so most students are either in study rooms or in their own dorms. The street lights illuminate the area just fine as they sit down. Ten keeps on talking about how important birthdays are. 

“I told you it’s no big deal.” Kun sits on the grass. “We barely knew each other back then, what was I supposed to say ‘Hi my name’s Kun, today is my birthday and Oh! I want your help for an upcoming film festival.’” 

“But…” 

“No buts, don’t worry about that.” 

Ten sulks some more, making sure Kun can hear his dramatic sighs just fine. This might be the first time they’re actually alone and Kun wonders if Mike was too busy to hold onto Ten like gum sticking on your shoes. He’s about to ask Ten about it but then, he hears him whisper. 

“I feel like I barely know anything about you.” Ten hugs his knees as he looks at Kun, his clothes look like they do nothing to keep him from the chilly weather. If he looks at him closely he can see a few things he didn’t notice at first, like the fact that Ten’s lips are chapped, his eyes don’t hold as much light as they usually do and overall his face looks gray, just like an old painting. 

Kun let’s his back rest on the grass as he focuses on the sky, sighing deeply as he goes through his mental notes once again. He knows Ten is looking at him, after all he’s

“There’s no time limit for us to get to know each other.” His eyes don’t move from the sky, looking at every single lonely cloud in sight make their way to some unknown place, wondering if lonely clouds would ever find a place where they’re not lonely anymore. 

“You’re right.” He hears Ten’s back touching the grass beside him and for a moment they just stay there. There’s rarely time to stay like this: quiet, calm, and timeless. It’s a small break from reality, them lying on the grass and listening to the sounds of the city being drowned by the trees surrounding them. 

The cold air suddenly doesn’t seem as cold as it did before, and it’s nice. 

“Oh fuck, I forgot my phone.” Ten sits up suddenly, touching the pocket on his jeans before facing Kun’s relaxed face. “Let me go get it, I’ll be right back.” 

Kun makes an approving sound as Ten gets up, then he hears the sound of Ten’s shoes hitting the pavement. Then, silence. 

He mind starts to wander, making a small drawing of what he thinks surrounds him: the group of small trees on his left side, bushes that bloom pretty flowers in the summer on the right, a street lamp a few meters away from him. He doesn’t have to open his eyes, if he can’t recall a certain object he will put something else on the blank space. For some reason, he imagines Ten sitting right beside the pretty bushes. 

Suddenly something poses itself on his forehead. He opens his eyes slightly, discovering a smiley Ten and a small package touching his forehead. 

He takes the package as he sits up, eyeing it quickly before looking at Ten’s Cheshire cat-like smile. 

“It’s not an amazing gift, but I really, really wanted to give you something.” He explains. “Happy Birthday, Kun. Please take this small vending machine cupcake as a symbol of our friendship.”

— February 

Mike breaks Ten’s heart a week before his surprise party. 

The reason remains unknown for days, mostly because Ten seems to busy himself out and partly because no one actually dares to ask. Not even himself. What they do know is that the pair had been having constant arguments, and if Kun had to guess, he would say it was mostly because of miscommunications and different schedules. 

Everyone feels it coming, but no one seems to be prepared to deal with Ten’s heartbroken self. Not even Ten himself. 

Ten becomes a workaholic, going from his classes to the study rooms, the art rooms and meeting Kun whenever he has time to discuss more details about the project they’re working on. But never once even mentioning Mike’s name, not even by accident. 

Kun thinks Doyoung will text him any day to tell him the party got cancelled, that it’s better not to put Ten through such an awkward situation like singing happy birthday as he blows up the candles of his cake. He’s surprised to see Doyoung so motivated to keep on with the plan, so passionate it even scares him. 

The party starts as a big mess. Mike’s friends invite themselves to the party, half of the actual guests don’t even show and Ten accidentally arrives earlier than everyone expected him to arrive. After that, there’s a moment of peace, where everyone starts having fun, dancing and drinking whatever’s on the small table Doyoung prepared. Doyoung stops trying to kick Mike’s friends out and Ten chats with Kun happily. There’s good music and food, everyone seems to be enjoying themselves and making new friends. 

That is until Mike arrives unannounced, making a beeline right to where Ten is dancing with his closest friends, taking him by the forearm and crying for something Kun can’t really understand nor hear. When he gets closer, he can hear Mike’s cries, he kneels on the floor right in front of Ten, asking for forgiveness and telling him it won’t happen again. 

Right then and there is where the whole party finds out Mike had been cheating on Ten with one of the Poe’s cafe’s barista. Kun finds himself scoffing in disbelief, wondering how someone like Mike could ever cheat on someone as caring as Ten. 

“You need to get up now, everyone’s staring at us.” Ten takes a quick look at his surroundings before lowering his head. “I made myself clear last time but if you need me to repeat it once again I will: I think it’ll be better if we went our separate ways.” 

“What you mean is that we need a break right? How long? Two weeks? Two and a half? Maybe three?” Mike looks like he’s about to pass out on the floor from his drunkenness. 

“What I mean is that this is it, I’m breaking up with you.” 

To say that the scene got even more dramatic after would be a misunderstanding. Mike doesn’t take the break up thing the right way, his friends try to put pressure on Ten to take him back, and Doyoung starts arguing with them once again, Ten’s friends join him right after. 

Ten finds himself in the middle of the argument, completely lost and overwhelmed. He pushes his own hair back, looking for a way to just get out of the circle that has formed full of people arguing. Then, he feels a hand around his wrist, pulling him out of the small crowd. 

He panics for a moment only to realize who that hand belongs to and let’s Kun drag him out of the area. 

They take the subway in total silence, meeting their destination just 7 minutes after and make their way back to Ten’s room. 

Ten is lucky enough to have a dorm all to himself, his roommate never arrived. They sit on the bed in silence once again. The wall seems to be telling its deepest secrets and they watch it attentively. Until Kun hears a sob. 

“Are you okay?” He asks genuinely. 

Ten shakes his head no, and Kun understands that for now, he might only need a shoulder to cry on. He let’s Ten cry all he needs and for every reason he needs to cry for. He’s not used to seeing Ten so sad and heartbroken, but it only reminds him just how he isn’t just a bubbly and caring person. He tries to stroke his hair, doing it softly at first just in case it makes Ten uncomfortable, and then more confidently when Ten doesn’t seem to hate it. 

“I think something inside me always knew he was cheating, but I was pretending I didn’t. Maybe for my own sake, maybe because I was scared of other people seeing this whole mess.” Ten wipes his own tears with his sweater sleeve. “My God, that was so embarrassing. I’m so sorry, Kun” 

“It 's okay.” Kun tells him. Ten holds onto his forearm softly, and normally Kun would’ve back down, too uncomfortable with anyone else’s contact. Well, everyone but Ten’s. It seems like he needs it, so he lets him hold his forearm in silence. 

Come to think of it, many things have changed ever since he met him for the first time two months ago. Ten somehow had come to give him a different view on a world Kun thought he had sorted out. He came in the form of a cold day that somehow he made feel warm and shook things up like a flock of birds though the trees. 

He has heard it before,  _ “Every person you encounter in life leaves their own mark on you.”  _ but he never thought Ten will turn his view upside down in so little time. 

“Cry all you need, I’m here for you.” He tells him, still caressing his head. “That’s what friends are for, right?” 

**_Friends. Huh, that’s a nice word._ **

Doyoung comes in just a couple of minutes later, followed by one of Ten’s newest friends, an elegant looking woman who he later heard him call Irene. 

The four of them get drunk, Kun makes sure they don’t make too much noise because he knows having alcohol inside the doors is forbidden and doesn’t want Ten to face more problems than he did. By 2 a.m. Irene starts giving Ten what she calls a TED talk of life. 

“I always hated him, with his bad poetry I can’t believe you even  _ thought  _ of him as someone interesting.” Her cheeks are red and Kun swears she’s about to fall asleep at any moment now. 

“His poetry was stolen, he just somehow turned something good into shitty.” Ten murmures, taking a sip straight from the bottle he’s holding. 

Kun himself is a little drunk too, but not as much as the other three are. While Doyoung whines about choosing Ten’s next partner, he stares at Ten, taking even every face feature he can and frowning.  _ ‘What even drew you to him in the first place?’.  _

“I don’t even know!” Ten whines. Oh, he said that out loud. “I thought he was cool and he started hitting on me so i thought ‘why not!’ He seems nice.”

“Oh that’s bad” Irene tells him, sitting on the floor right beside Kun. Kun nods in agreement. 

“My Ten, my poor friend Ten I will never let a man hit on you without my approval again.” Doyoung hugs Ten from behind, placing his head on Ten’s shoulder. Irene crawls their way, hugging Ten too. 

“ **Our** approval.” She says. 

“Why is love so hard to find.” Ten whines, his body seems to be melting into the hug, resting his head on Irene’s shoulder as they form a big group hug. 

Ten manages to get his left arm out of the group hug asking for Kun to hold his hand. Kun crawls closer to them, and just sits there, holding Ten’s hand as him and his friends hug for a long time. 

Love  _ is _ hard to find. He nods to himself at that thought.

By the time the hug is over, they know it’s time to go. Doyoung stays with Ten and Kun offers to walk Irene back to her own dorm. On the way, Irene asks him to stop to buy some water from a vending machine. 

They sit on a bench beside the vending machine, hoping the water will sober them up a little more. 

“You’re a nice person.” She says out of nowhere. 

“And you seem to be an amazing friend.” He replies. Irene laughs, before settling her water bottle down. 

“Ten was so excited when you asked him to help with your project. We were excited for him too. It’s nice to finally know you.” She continues. “Please take care of him. Don’t be too hard on him but don’t treat him like he’s clueless all the time. He will impress you, with his own way of perceiving the world, his personality…” 

He takes a moment to process Irene’s words, seems like he’s not the only one who sees something different and special in Ten. 

“He already does. All the time.” 

—May

Three months come and go with the flowers blooming in those small bushes. As the date gets closer, the stress increases. 

Today, they’re filming. 

This is what Kun has been working on for months, finding actors, artists and a good place to film everything. The staff being a few of his and Ten’s friends who gladly decided to help him for a whole weekend. 

The filming begins early on a chilly Friday. It’s close to 5 a.m. and they hurry to catch the sunrise, fixing a few more details in the set, the actor’s makeup and checking the camera angles once again. 

“Kun?” Sicheng calls, approaching said male hurriedly. “I was just on the phone with Taeyong, I have bad news.” 

Kun’s body feels cold, he looks at Sicheng anxiously. 

“He can’t make it, he said he’s been throwing up since last night and his roommate is taking him to the hospital.” 

Taeyong was supposed to be the film’s main character, the story revolves around him finding himself through art and includes many scenes of him creating art freely. If he asks any other actor to take his place like Jaehyun or calls a new actor last minute, he’s sure none of the art pieces will turn out the way he needs them. He leaves the set just 20 minutes before they have to start filming, to one of the rooms that is empty. 

Finding this place took him about three months, negotiating with the owners about the price took him way too long but he finally convinced them to rent the house for a cheaper price. He doesn’t mean to get frustrated at this inconvenience —he’s sure he’ll laugh about it once this is finished— but right now Taeyong being sick seems like the worst thing that could’ve happened to him.

He paces around the room back and forth endlessly, trying to create a plan to fill Teyongs empty space. He can use Jaehyun, who is an amazing actor for other scenes, but he’s not sure he can give up on having the main character create an art piece on the spot and without thinking about it. 

There’s a knock, followed by someone opening the door. Sicheng steps in and stares at Kun as he keeps pacing around the room. 

“Frustrated?” He asks. 

“Like hell.” 

Sicheng hums before making his way to the chair placed on one of the corners of the room, checking the time on his phone quickly. He yawns, looking at Kun with his eyes painted in boredom. 

“You’re so… Complicated.” He tells him. Resting his back on the chair and closing his eyes for a moment. 

He hears Kun groan somewhere and smirks. 

“You don’t understand, I’ve been working nonstop for this and now the main character is not even here. I can’t even get mad at him because he’s clearly sick!”

“Getting frustrated won’t get you anywhere. But lucky for you I’m an amazing friend so…” Sicheng gets up, walking towards Kun and taking him by the shoulders. 

“You have the really handsome and extremely talented Jaehyun here, right?”

Kun nods.

“Do you think he can learn his lines in time for when you have to film the dialogs?” 

“I-I think so?”

This time Sicheng nods. 

“And you also have that other art student here, right?” He continues. 

“Huh?” 

“The one who has been helping you with the set and props?” Sicheng questions. “The small one.” 

Oh, he means Ten. 

“Yeah, he’s somewhere downstairs.” 

“Mhm, so why don’t you ask Jaehyun to learn his new lines and ask your short art friend to replace Jae for the art scenes?” 

“I could kiss you right now, you know” Kun hugs Sicheng, lifting him and spinning with him in his arms before setting him down. 

“Go, go we need to hurry, there’s only 6 minutes left before the sunrise!” Sicheng giggles. 

  
  


— 

  
  


Jaehyun learns his lines and adapts his character quicker than expected, the first day of filming goes by smoothly. The real challenge arrives when it’s time to film the art scenes. The set is simple and minimalist, perfect for anyone to drench it in art and color it. Ten’s tasks seem simple, painting something and letting the camera crew (Kun and Sicheng) film his hands, his shoes and other small details as he finishes the artpiece. 

He stayed up until late at night talking to Kun, asking multiple times if he’s sure he wants him to help him, if it wouldn’t be a better idea to ask Ten to find someone else to do it. 

“If there’s anyone who can do it it’s you. You know the character, you know the feelings I’m trying to express, the prompts hanging from the walls last night were  _ your  _ paintings. I know you can do this, Ten. I’m sure you can.” Last night hearing those words over the phone did wonders, just like magic disappearing all his worries. 

But today, Ten’s hands tremble while he holds a brush over the canvas, unable to paint a single stroke against the white fabric. 

He knows everyone’s watching him, and it only builds up even more stress he has to carry on his shoulders. The staff, the actors, Irene, everyone watches him, holding their breaths. Kun is the first one to let a sigh out of his mouth, breaking the silence. 

“I need everyone to leave the set now.” He looks over his shoulder. “Please come back after we’re done here.” 

Everyone starts leaving, Jaehyun —who Ten finds extremely friendly despite being intimidatingly handsome —  makes sure to give Ten a thumb up before leaving the set with the rest of the staff. Now there’s only him, Kun, Sicheng and a medium size camera that stresses him out. 

“You too, Sicheng. Please.” 

Sicheng sends him a confused look, before quietly making his way out to find the rest of Kun’s friends. 

“Should we do this?” He asks, positioning himself behind the camera once again. 

Ten takes a deep breath just as Kun starts the countdown to start recording. But even after the count has stopped he can’t bring himself to stain the canvas. A single drop falls onto the white material by accident, and Ten is sure he has messed the whole thing up. 

“Remember when we talked about the main character?” Kun asks, still behind the camera. Ten nods. “Let’s think like him. Think about those days he tried every single sport, every language, every after school activity. How did the character feel?”

“Frustrated.” Ten’s brush moves without much thinking, using that single stain to create a line right in the middle of the white square. “He had tried everything and you said you wanted to portrait the frustration everyone has when they feel like they don’t fit in.” 

“How much did it take  _ you  _ to realize you liked art?” 

“Not much, but it took so long for my mother to finally approve my passion.” He grabs a clean brush, grabbing some ocean blue paint as Kun moves to position the camera in the right angle to show the abandoned brush. “My grandpa told her that if she was not willing to help me fitfull my dream then he would, he offered to pay for college and just then my mom realized this was something I wanted to do.” 

His hands seem to work on their own, furious blue strokes creating abstract paths along the canvas. Then, he switches brushes once again, working with a much more gentle blue, hands working like gentle waves kissing sand. 

“Back then I didn’t realize she did it because she was scared. Art seemed to be a one way street, and most artists seem to be faceless people behind a signature no one knows about.” 

“Art is so comforting but so, so scary. I finally got it.”

Ten keeps switching brushes and picking different colors, and Kun seems to dance around the room with his camera. Sometimes choosing a close up look and others just staying as far away from Ten as he possibly can. By the time Ten finishes, Kun is finally able to see the full painting. His breath gets stuck inside his throat. 

Great raging waves seem to have completely destroyed a ship, and to one side of the keel, two people, one of them seems to be naked while the other is completely covered. No land in sight, no way to guess if they’re safe or not. Looking closely he can see the person who’s naked looks just like the one who’s covered. In the corner, Ten’s signature. 

“Our own wave.” He tells Kun. 

  
  


— 

Kun leaves the states right after winning the college’s film festival. He finds himself on a plane to Shanghai less than a month after winning, on his way to study a full semester there. Most of his days, he’s too busy to answer the phone so Johnny and Sicheng don’t insist on getting in contact with him, just ask him to keep them updated. His new friends, however, insist profusely. Doyoung and Ten call and message him the most, Irene only does from time to time. They have a schedule, calling Kun first thing in the morning on Saturdays, sometimes even having dinner while he’s taking his morning coffee. It goes on for a few months, until Doyoung is too busy to join the call. 

Ten appears on his screen one Saturday morning and a lot more late than usual. 

“Aren’t you tired? Johnny told me he has seen you running around campus all week.” 

Just like magic, Ten yawns. 

“I am, but I wanted to talk to you.” Ten tells him. He seems to be lying on the floor of his dorm, fluffy white carpet under him. “I have really good news.” 

Kun places his iced coffee down to fully paying attention to the man on the screen. 

“You won’t guess who asked for a personalized painting.” Ten tells him. 

“Who?” 

Ten keeps smiling at the camera, not being able to hide his excitement. Kun asks two more times before Ten can casually answer his question. 

“Do you know about the Poetic Beauty modeling agency?” 

“No way.” Kun whispers. 

“THAT’S WHAT I SAID TOO!” Ten screams. There’s a knock on Ten’s door followed by the words  **_“shut up!”_ ** . They laugh silently. “The CEO asked for a 48’’ x 36’’ painting and gave me full freedom to paint whatever I want.”

“Ten, that’s great! Like really good actually.” Kun tells him. “Congratulations.” 

They talk some more about their lives, and it seems like a few months can make big changes on people. Seconds turn into minutes, minutes turn into hours. By the time Kun checks the time he realizes he has spent almost half of his day talking. 

“It’s like 4 a.m. there, aren’t you tired?” Kun asks, Ten lifts his head from the fluffy carpet. 

“I am, just a little. But I like talking to you.” 

Kun hums. It’s nice talking to Ten too, what started as a coworker kind of relationship turned into a good friendship that allows him to talk freely, to discuss and get a completely different point of view. 

“You’re coming back before the end of semester, right?” Ten breaks the small silence. 

“Yeah, I think I’ll be there by the second week of December.” Kun answers. “I just finished my finals so now I have most of my day free.” 

“Lucky.” 

There’s silence once again, the fairy lights hanging from Ten’s wall play with his now blond and pink hair, and he remembers just how pretty the man looked back when they were still working inside the art room. Ten is handsome, his delicate facial features and sharp eyes keep his whole self in harmony. There’s no denial that he’s good looking, his friends say it all the time, Kun’s friends have mentioned it once or twice and he even has heard other students comment on how good Ten looks while he’s focused on his work. 

“I think it’s time for you to go to—” Kun comes back to reality, just to see Ten already sleeping on the floor. “sleep. Goodnight, Ten.” 

  
  
  


— December.

Johnny, Sicheng and Ten come to pick him up from the airport. The airport seems emptier than usual, maybe due to the fact that it’s barely 5 a.m. and it doesn’t take him a lot of time to find his friends. Each one of the hugs him, telling him how happy they are to see him back. Kun realizes this is the first time he has actually hugged Ten. 

They’re on their way back to campus, but the traffic is horrible and after trying to avoid it for a good 15 minutes they finally get stuck in a traffic jam. Kun’s eyelids feel heavier than they’ve ever been as he hears everyone talk about their plans for Christmas, and it seems like everyone will be going back to their homes, including himself even though he just arrived in New York. He yawns quietly, his eyes closing for a moment before opening them quickly at the sound of Johnny’s laugh. 

He feels Ten’s hand on his arm, pulling him towards his body and gently placing Kun’s head on his shoulder. 

“You should sleep, I don’t think we’ll get to campus anytime soon.” 

Kun eyes betray him before he even has the chance to tell Ten he’s okay and not even that sleepy. 

—

It’s the week before Christmas and the whole campus seems to be busy taking their suitcases out and catching taxis to go to the airport. Johnny has already arrived at his own home in Chicago, being the first one to leave because he missed his mom’s meals way too much to stay a few days more, Sicheng is probably in the airport already and Doyoung and Irene visit Kun just to say goodbye and wish him Merry Christmas. Everyone will be back to celebrate new years together. 

Ten’s plan seems to be catching a flight just before Christmas, just like Kun. He knows Ten has been busy finishing the modeling agency’s art piece and a few more orders he received through his small online business, so he doesn’t visit him until three days before Christmas. He texts Ten after finding some of his art supplies inside his own case, asking if it’s okay for him to drop by to return the supplies before he finishes packing his suitcase. 

When he arrives, he finds Ten’s belongings untouched and in place, clothes hanging on the closet and a desk full of more art supplies. 

“Aren’t you going to pack to go home?” 

“I’m not going home.” Ten says. 

“What do you mean you’re not going home? Everyone thinks you are.” 

Ten moves his chair from the desk and the small painting he’s currently working on. 

“Not enough money for the ticket.” He tells Kun, like it's the simplest thing. 

“I thought you had gotten quite a bit of money from your works?” 

“Yeah but that’s for my sister’s college, I want to help my parents pay for it. So yeah, first christmas all by myself.” 

—

Kun leaves for the airport earlier than he should just to be sure the night is cold as he takes a taxi hurriedly, but still arrives late. The snow has created a pretty bad traffic jam and his taxi driver doesn’t seem to be interested in taking another route to avoid it, he tells his father over text. By the time he makes it to the airport his flight is already about to take off. He sends a voice message to his dad instead of a text this time, telling him he won’t be able to make it in time for christmas and apologizing for missing the fight even though it technically wasn’t his fault. And by the time he makes it back to campus the clock has struck midnight and It’s officially the 24th of december. 

Yeah, there's nothing he could do about the flight anyway. 

He carries his tired body to his dorm. 

— 

Ten’s surprised face as he opens the door to see Kun is almost funny. It’s 2 a.m. and he has many questions that can’t even make it out of his mouth before Kun invites himself inside the room and plops onto his bed. 

“I missed my flight last night, all other flights got cancelled because of the snow and I can’t sleep because the apartment's door is closed until the morning.” Kun says before finally falling asleep. 

Didn’t he say he would leave extra early just to be sure? Did something happen? Does Kun’s family know he’s not going to make it in time to celebrate christmas?

Ten decides he will ask questions tomorrow, too tired to process everything his brain tells him into words. For now he only shoves Kun to the other side of his own bed and gets under the covers to continue sleeping. 

They both wake up around the same time and just… stare at the ceiling, Kun has been pushed to the floor somewhere in the middle of the night but he doesn't complain, the fluffy carpet making his fall a little softer. 

"Kun?" 

"Hmm?" 

"It's Christmas Eve." 

"It is, Ten." He tells him as he sits up. He thinks he will remember this morning for years, a Christmas that doesn't really feel like Christmas. 

"We should do something, so it doesn't just feel like another regular day." To be completely honest, Kun doesn't really care about Christmas. It's nice spending time with his family and cooking together with his mom but other than that he hasn't found anything truly special about the date since he was 14 years old. 

But he feels for Ten, because Ten seemed eager to finally visit his own family after a long time. And even though they're not actually related he thinks it'll be nice to do this for Ten, who is spending his Christmas all by himself. 

"Like what?" Ten tells him. 

Well, he thinks it's a nice plan until he realizes he doesn't actually have a  _ plan _ . 

"Don't know. What do you suggest?" He takes a look at Ten's dorm as he speaks. 

He hasn't been there as much as others might have, and this is the first time he actually looks at it. It's similar to his own dorm room, very minimalist with bold black, gray and white colors in the walls, the bed and even inside his closet. Then there's the desk, which is overflowed with all the colors the rest of the room lacks. And even though Ten is usually referenced to as bubbly and cheerful by everyone around them he can't help but feel that this too feels exactly like Ten. 

"We should buy each other gifts." He tells him. "And maybe eat dinner here?" 

  
  


— 

They end up taking the subway to the nearest Target they can find and separating from the other to go gift haunting. There are two simple rules: 1. Don't spend too much on the gift, we still need to pay for dinner. And 2. Don't get caught. 

But when 10 minutes have passed and Ten doesn't know what he could gift Kun he starts to panic. He knows Kun, but does he actually know him well? 

He runs through the store hurriedly and he's sure there's only so much time left until a worker comes to tell him he can't run inside the store. What can he give him? A pencil case? Too boring. A new backpack? Too ordinary. A new planner? Too… 

Kun told him he was almost done with his planner a few days ago and that he needed to order a new one. But how can he make a simple planner into a beautiful gift for Kun? Especially with so little time. 

He decides he needs to worry about it later and just buy it. He makes his way to pay for the gift, hiding it well between his coat just in case Kun sees him. He walks fast, paying for the gift and standing outside the store to wait for Kun who he —thankfully— hasn't seen ever since they got in. 

While standing outside he makes a reminder to call his family and wish him Merry Christmas and wonders if the snow will paint the city today too. The cold breeze seems to whisper the coming of the snow. 

  
  


— 

  
  


By the evening they both meet up outside Johnny's dorm after spending half of the day wrapping their gifts. Johnny has been kind enough to let them borrow his car after making them promise they will pay for the gas. The gifts are placed in the backseat of the car along with some blankets and their backpacks, and they dress warmly. 

After making sure they're not forgetting anything inside their dorms, Kun starts to drive. 

The sun will set any moment from now and they manage to avoid heavy traffic and get to a small park not too far away from the campus. Ten is in charge of choosing songs, aux cord plugged in his phone and they drive in silence. It's nice, the fact that even silence seems to be comforting between them. Kun has never been someone talkative and even though Ten is very friendly he enjoys the moments where words don't exactly need to be said to appreciate moments like this. 

Ten appreciates Kun, even though he just met him less than a year ago and even if when they started working together no many words were interchanged between them. 

He hopes Kun is aware of just how much he appreciates his friendship, and how thankful he is for all the help he brought him when he needed it. 

After finding a place to park the car they finally get out of the car, enjoying the cold breeze and the sounds of the city that the trees seem to drown into mere background noises. The sun falls peacefully from the sky, hiding itself to let the moon finally shine. They spend the time watching the sun hide while they sit side by side, wrapped in their own blankets. 

"Can I ask you something?" Ten looks at Kun. 

"Do it." He smiles. 

"I know we're only one semester apart but, how was your first semester here?" 

Kun doesn't think too often about the past, for him memories are the ones choosing to stay or to go so he doesn't keep too many inside his brain. But he does remember the first day he arrived in New York. Completely clueless but still excited to finally have the freedom of taking his own choices. 

"Hard." He tells him sincerely. "I was not just a little bit away from how, suddenly moving all by myself here at the age of eighteen seemed to be quite the challenge." 

"But I was also excited, to finally take my own decisions, to be a little more independent and to let my parents know I was responsible enough to live by myself in a new country." 

Ten nods at his words, bringing his knees close to his chest and placing his chin right above them. He looks at the sky turning deep blue. 

"You know, I often think I was so excited to be independent that I let my excitement take over my rational side." He mentions casually. "I would've been completely fine single and focusing on getting used to this new country but I was so excited that I thought I should do it all and experience everything I could." 

Kun looks at him. "How so?" 

"Rushing to get a boyfriend I still don't know I even liked, wanting to go out as much as I could and sometimes attending parties even if that meant working on my assignments all night." He tells him. "I could've taken my time and done all that later on." 

Kun understands the feeling, he has been there and has seen his friends go through the same thing. 

"I think that's common." Kun tilts his head to the side while looking at the space right in front of him. "Everyone goes through it and one or two months after we all wish we didn't. I think that's also part of this whole college experience." 

Ten hums, he understands that it happens to other students all the time, but can't help but feel like he's by himself. 

"We should probably go get something to eat, most restaurants close early today." Kun sighs. 

Ten often finds himself looking at Kun, eyeing the small details on his face, how his brows follow a path or the way his jaw seems to be sharp but gentle. He loves looking at small details of different people but has found himself staring at Kun a little longer and tracing sketches of the man's face inside his brain to keep it close to his memories. He gets up, still wrapped in his blanket and walking side by side with Kun back to the car. 

If Kun notices him staring he says nothing. But one of the two hearts seems to beat inside the owner's ear loudly.

  
  


— 

They decide to get KFC chicken and sit inside the car in the parking lot, eating with gusto. They tell stories and share secrets, laughing loudly and almost choking with their food. What started as a plan to not feel so lonely turned into a simple yet meaningful Christmas celebration. 

"My dad and I used to team up when we played monopoly but somehow my mom and sister always won every single game." Ten tells him, frowning but with a smile painted on his face. "I asked my dad about it the other day and he said we just don't know how to manage money properly." 

Kun laughs loudly, sending his body backward and making the car seat shake. 

By the time they finish having dinner it's almost midnight, almost Christmas. 

They clean their hands and drink some water before deciding on what to do next. 

"Oh! the presents, I almost forgot about them" Ten turns his torso to grab the gifts, giving Kun his own bag while he grabs his too. "This is funny, secret Santa but it's just the two of us with a $20 budget." 

They giggle once again before exchanging gifts. Ten's is wrapped in purple wrapping paper while Kun's is wrapped in blue colored paper. Both of the gifts are rectangle shaped and they hurry to reveal them. 

Ten gets a pencil case, filled with a brand of color pencils he knows too well. He has told Kun some week ago and over video call the story of how he always wanted Luna brand colour pencils as a kid but couldn't afford them, and as time went by he forgot about them because the quality wasn't good enough to use in his project and he hasn't seen the brand in a while. 

Kun's gift is that small bullet journal he told Ten he wanted to buy, the cover is a solid black but when he opens the first page he recognizes Ten's drawings. He has drawn his side profile and a camera in front of him, filled with colors and doodles that will remind him of their time as friends. "Keep precious memories close to your heart" is written right above the drawing. 

Their cheeks are warm and blushy, even if they can't quite see it in the other's face due to the lack of good lighting. They thank the other and laugh, not really sure if out of embarrassment or just because the whole secret Santa thing seems funny, but they do anyway. 

There are suddenly a few fireworks lighting up the sky and decorating the night with various colors. Ten rolls his window down to stick his head out and take a better look of the lights dancing in the sky.

If Kun could choose what memories stay inside his brain, he will choose to save this one first. This warm feeling, the way his heart seems happy and at peace and the way his eyes can't help but admire the side profile of who came into his life to turn it upside down. 

"Merry Christmas, Kun." Ten turns his head to look at him, the fireworks suddenly paint the side of his hair pink and purple as he does. 

"Merry Christmas, Ten." 

After, they decide to drive back to the campus. Stopping once to fill the tank and once again in a convenience store to buy some soda. 

2 a.m. is painted on the clock by the time they finally decide to go back to their own dorms, wishing the other goodnight. 

But by the time Kun is in bed, already under the blankets and staring at his own ceiling once again he can't help but wonder about that feeling inside his chest, about why he chose to prepare a whole day just for Ten to feel less lonely. 

And why he purposely asked the taxi driver to take the long route to the airport. 

_ 'It's because you didn't wanted him to spend Christmas by himself, you're just a nice friend.' _

He chooses to believe this thought and blame the Christmas spirit for the feeling inside his chest. 

  
  


— 

  
  


A text wakes him up early in the morning. He looks at his notification, various texts from his friends and family wishing him Merry Christmas and the most recent one being Ten's. 

_ Ten:  _

_ "Thanks for spending Christmas with me. I appreciate it, a lot <3."  _

  
  


He's not sure he can blame his feelings on the Christmas spirit again. 

**Author's Note:**

> @10velyfebruary on twt


End file.
